Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Tuesday Tip: Plan A 1st Kiss Party!

Saving My First Kiss… Yes, the title says it all doesn’t it? Ever since I read a snippet of the book in a Brio magazine I was hooked! In fact, I began to “plan” my party right away...I’ll get to that a little later. Anyways, I had always wanted to buy & read the rest of the book, but fear stopped me. Cause ya know the people at the checkout are gonna know when I plop my purchase down that “Hey, this girl’s never been kissed before!” I imagined them stifling laughter. Perhaps they’d wait till I leave the store to let their giggles out (that would be kind=). And heaven forbid the cashier be a male, that would be the ultimate end – no way could I buy a book with such a title in front of a guy! My face would surely turn the color of a bright red Valentine’s heart (a token I feared I’d never receive). I know, I know who thinks this way? Who cares so intently what cashiers think? Well, I do, that’s who! So I did what any self-respecting girl would do, I broke down & bought it online.
Saving It!Fashion Trends & Styles - Polyvore

Saving It...
I know there’s lots of thoughts on kissing – some say kissing during dating is fine, some say for engagement, others for marriage. The Bible doesn’t tell us: Thou shall kiss only when ______. However, kisses are precious & intimate. Would you want to give them away to lots of guys who later file out just as they filed in…solo, leaving you with a wounded heart & the memory of kisses wasted on someone who wasn’t “the one”? I totally respect those who have committed to save their first kiss for marriage…that will be another amazing gift to present to your husband. Likewise, I respect those who have given their kisses sparingly, realizing the importance of locking lips. I’m planning to save my first kiss for someone special who is hopefully the only one I will ever smooch, my knight-in-shining-armor.
If you’ve given your kisses away in the past without much thought, you can start today saving your next kiss for someone special, using discernment & prayer (which we all should do in all aspects of life).

What I’ve Learned…
You know, there are lots of things we “know” that don’t always register deep down. Things like God’s love & faithfulness, for instance, & God’s perfect timing, for another. Sometimes it takes someone else – perhaps even an unexpected source – to truly help us to “get it.” In Lisa’s book, her words were that for me, because she’s been right where I am. Now this doesn’t mean I won’t “lose” it again, but her reminder is such an encouragement. Now there are some things we don’t know & need to uncover… many times as girls, we think we’re the only one who feels a particular way – we’re outcasts, something’s wrong with us, we’re just not good enough, etc. The funny thing is, when we start to share, we find that we aren’t alone in our oh-so-exclusive feelings. There’s something truly encouraging about girls opening up. Lisa shares about waiting & wondering whether there's even a Prince Charming out there for her - feelings I know very well. I believe many times the devil encourages us to keep silent, so that we won’t uncover the truth that we are not alone in our struggle.

The Confession…
So, I’m admitting girls, that my lips are virgin… & you know what? I’m not always happy about that, but I know that I don’t want to have to tell my future husband that my lips have been kissed by countless others who have since gone by. I don’t want to give my precious, high-price kisses to someone (or someones) who later break my heart. I also know that God’s got a plan & that I’m planning a party!

Party PlannerFashion Trends & Styles - Polyvore

Lisa’s Great Idea…
I failed to tell you the tag line to Lisa’s book is “Why I’m Keeping Confetti in My Closet.” Yep, that’s right, Lisa came up with the magnificent idea to have a first kiss party: a big ole’ celebration for when your lips finally meet that special someone’s! So, I’m planning a special get-together for one (me) for that special day…

What’s In Bess’ Closet…
In my party supply box in my closet I’ve got:
-a letter I wrote myself (sealed with a kiss, of course=) (In the letter I remind myself to keep my relationship pure, seek my Father’s guidance, remember my first & greatest love is God, etc. , & to congratulate myself on saving my first kiss!=)
-a package of Hershey’s Kissables (I found a small pink package of these at my local party/card store. I think they were to announce the birth of a baby girl, cause there were blue packages, too, but the pink looked cute with my “love” theme. The funny thing is, I’ve bought a couple of these now, & they keep expiring before I get my kiss! They just don’t have a long enough expiration date, & I just think, “God, can I find “the one” & get my kiss before these things expire again? Please!” Oh, goodness, like I’ve got the perfect timing thing God does!
-a note pad shaped like a pair of lips (I got these after Valentine’s Day on clearance – that’s a great time to find stuff.)
-a plastic tiara
-a party hat & noise-maker from the Dollar Tree
-a small puzzle featuring classic Disney couples kissing (I got this just the other day at my Dollar Tree. It’s a party favor for me!=)
-a bunch of other kiss-themed odds & ends (like confetti, stickers, etc.)

So, go plan your party whether you’ve never been kissed or your renewing your next kiss for someone special!

"Dreaming of True Love's Kiss"...

It's sorta hard to believe that Disney's Enchanted has something to say about purity. As you listen to this somewhat funny song, listen closely to the words, some of them ring very clear & true...& yes, I'm dreaming of true love's [first] kiss!

Another purity book I’ve read & can recommend:
Wait For Me: Rediscovering the Joy of Purity in Romance by Rebecca St. James


P.S.: Sorry this has seemed like a long post! I'm planning on sharing bits of my secret diary in my next post! Shhh!


  1. I loved what you said at the beginning about being too nervous to buy the book...I've done that all the time! I used to really want one of Chad Eastham's books, but I would never buy it because there was this cute young guy working at the Christian bookstore. =) And the book was called "The Truth About Guys." Awkward!

    I'm also saving my first kiss for the man who I'll marry. I don't plan on waiting for my wedding day, or even engagement, but I won't kiss him unless we've been in a serious relationship/courtship and I'm sure he's the one God has for me to marry.


  2. Wow soooo much of this sounds like me, it's ridiculous! I have that problem with buying 'Sacred Singleness' by Leslie Ludy; I've read a preview of it on Google Books, and I really like what I've read so far, and really want to buy it, but I'm worried what the shop assistant serving me will think. =S It's a completely dumb fear, but it's still there...

    I love the idea of saving your first kiss until marriage, but I'm not sure I'd save it for that long. Maybe when I'm engaged? I still need to work this out, but there'll be plenty of time for that ;)

    And you're absolutely right; we need to honest about how our decision to live pure lives has affected us. It's such an awesome, godly thing to do, but that doesn't mean it's easy!

    God bless


  3. Thanks for your thoughts! See, it seems a lot of us are quaking over cashiers! I do need to work on that a little more...it seems like that fear would be whittled down to "what will people think," which I shouldn't fear. Just what God thinks is important. You know I've bought a few things I wouldn't really have wanted to (& used to never do in front of males) in front of guys in the last few weeks. Perhaps I'm slowing finding the right track, but I still need work in other greater areas of the "what would people think" fear! We are a work in progress, & I'm so glad God put the following verse in the Bible: "being confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus" -Philippians 1:6

    Love Ya,
    =) ><>

  4. It's little steps like that that bring about change, Bess! =)

    When I was journaling one day, the topic of fears came up somehow, and I listed out all of my fears. Then I realized that there was one common theme running through all of them: the fear of worrying what others think of me. Seriously, all of my fears revolve around that one. And I know that's something I need to really work on. It's pretty ridiculous, when you think about it. I've always been a people pleaser and wanted everyone to like me...but it needs to change. If the Creator of the universe loves me and accepts me the way I am, what else really matters?


  5. Bess & Kristin - same here! Definitely something I need to work on.

    Just wondering...what exactly would a first kiss party be like? Is it a literal party, or more a quiet, personal celebration?


  6. Yes, Anneliese, we could form a support group! =) About the party - mine is going to be a personal party for one. I still have about a couple chapters left in the book, but it sounds like the author's party might be more of a “get-together with people” party. Anyhow, the author talks about how she knows this whole party idea may seem wacky or plain silly, but it's helped her get her mind off of her virgin lips (which she used to dwell on & have pity “parties” about=)...& it's let her realize that saving your kisses for someone special (& God’s perfect timing) is definitely something to celebrate! I know it’s kinda crazy (or just plain crazy), but I like it! =)

    Lots of Love in Christ,

  7. I am so glad you shared this! I love in this video her long hair. (I know that's kind of random). (I am growing mine out)

    Anyways, Bess, I am given more hope knowing that I am waiting along with my big sis in Christ (and others of course) on saving our precious kisses for our godly princes! (That sure did rhyme!)

    And yes, camp really was the ULTIMATE God-thing. Wow, I loved your comment! Thank you!

    Love ya, and I know for certain that because you've waited so long, God will fulfill your desire(s). Praying for you sis!


Hey! Thanks so much for stopping by Bess' Bag - I love these "little visits!" Feel free to leave your respectful insight here... =)